Pop Cesspool

ALL U NEED TO KNOW ABOUT WASHINGTON IS IN THIS SENTENCE

Steve Inskeep on Robert Caro:

Caro writes about flawed, vindictive men who degraded democracy but wielded power brilliantly.

You could describe a lot of dudes, very accurately, using only the adjectives and adverbs in that sentence.

THE CENTER OF GRAVITY IN 'GAME OF THRONES' IS NOT TITS OR DEATH

It's maps. Nerds love that shit. HBO obviously knew this, because the first thing you see when you watch the show isn't some hot nude costume-drama ladies or dudes gettin' their heads chopped off. It's a map. A map with details that grow while you look at it. A map that isn't quite the same from week to week. Wait, IS HBO MAKING FUN OF NERDS?

IF YOU'RE GOING TO SAY 'SHAKE THAT ASS,' YOU SHOULD MEAN IT

Like the way Mr. Jon Spencer says it here, at about 1:33:

SIDE NOTE: Chewbacca:Han Solo::the drummer Russell Simins:Jon Spencer's theramin solo

BONUS, SWEET BONUS:

When he pulls down the word "BLUES" it would make an awesome animated GIF, right, kiddies?

MCNAUGHTON'S SIGNATURE IS VERY 'BLACK METAL'

Jon McNaughton of McNaughton Fine Art, that is. Am I right? Check it:

From this:

KIDS DOING BAD THINGS

There is actually no connection between the next two videos, other than the fact that I watched them on the same day, and I thought it might be really cool to get these kids together for a playdate or something:

F YOUR BRACKET

Yer Poppa ain't usually all zeitgeisty in his hate, but apparently I'm not the only MF who's nixing the bracketology this year despite being a sports fan in general. Dudes have their reasons. For me, it's about my ever-waning ties to the product. In my ever-contracting mind, college basketball has become a thing for:

• college kids
• dudes who still wish they were in college
• dudes who really really like basketball
• dudes and chicks who went to one of the colleges that give Dick Vitale super-stiff wood
• dudes and chicks who went to colleges that got really good at basketball only recently and now have a nationally viable brand name because of it (which, technically, is a subset of "colleges that give Dick Vitale super-stiff wood")
• people who will wager $5 on anything

Anyway, I'm not any of those things right now. So ... no bracket.

(Sorry about all the orange dicks. Kinda looks like some Keith Haring shit, though, which is nice.)

LET'S MAKE FUN OF SOME RICH PEOPLE

Sitaras Fitness, Where Business Titans Work Out. In some "Super Bowl Shuffle" type of shit.

OK, maybe those aren't exactly emm-effing Zubaz. But they look like they smell like pee-pee.

CALCULUS, HIP-HOP, LIL B

You know how in calculus, the "limit" of any equation is important? Because decimals can always get smaller and smaller? Or something like that? Like, because some equations can't hit 7 ever because there's always another decimal point after 6.999999999999999? If hip-hop is some giant equation -- and you know somebody somewhere is trying to compute that shit; don't even tell me they aren't; rap dudes inevitably see Pi and think they can be that guy -- then Lil B's raison d'être is to fuck infinitely/infinitesimally with all the variables that represent "coherence" and "purpose." This "Breath Slow" thing certainly ain't verging on the potentially deepest point of the trough, but it's goin' down down down:

I wish he would've truly tested whether his pants would stay up with the revolver in the band.